A management trainee, that's what
But at eighteen he left
He joined the RAF for five long years
at flying he was deft!
Demobbed he didn't want to go
back to an office job
So he joined up with Blackpool Police
to conquer crime and yobs
Riding a bike in pouring rain
on dark nights was not merry
Nor was it quite as good as dropping
bombs upon the jerries!
The pinnacle of his career
in fighting crime was tough
He'd been sent to a shop because
someone had stolen stuff
Ready to pounce he then found out
the criminal was not
A nasty thief but someone who
had merely lost the plot!
A lady with dementia had
picked up something in error
Thus Dixon of Dock Green withdrew
So much for reign of terror!
Once Ted had helped the cops as much
as he felt that he could
He somehow joined the Telegraph
And soon got rather good
Was sent to work in Newcastle
and was their north east man
He kept reporting nice and crisp
As only Walkers can!
He left the Telegraph to run
three major publications
He steered them through without a fuss
nor untoward sensations!
Retired in eighty eight and moved
back into Lancs and Lytham
Joined Probus then and settled in
to quite a steady rhythm
Was President nine years ago
and then made a Life Member
A proud achievement for our Ted
One he will long remember.
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Gerry Goss
The next man I shall talk about
His name you must work out
An anagram of Sorry Eggs
I've scrambled it no doubt!
Was in the Navy and then joined
insurance - he was good
New policies sold far and wide
in case of fire or flood!
Promoted to branch manager
and posted here and there
Then Admin Manager at Leeds
A job back home - quite rare!
Then Gerry moved to Lytham and
was made Head of IT
But this was not because he was
a whizz on a PC
No. Gerry's forte was and is
the way he handles folk
He's cool and shrewd but charming too
A really cracking bloke
And even once he'd left the firm
they called him back to tell
the people wanting to retire
that home life could be hell!
He's been our President and then
was made Life Member too
He sometimes chairs our meetings
but not if he can't woo!
You see he'll study speaker lists
where ladies' names are given
Then volunteer to do the chair
He's like a David Niven!
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Cliff Elliott
Cliff Elliott's our Social Sec
He hails from Coventry
Joined GEC when he was young
and soon gained a degree
At twenty five they sent him off
abroad to help install
a 'phone link in Nigeria
so folk could make that call!
In Africa he learnt to fly
and carried on back here
At flying school he honed those skills
and cruised the skies - no fear
Upon his third flight on his own
he very nearly died
Crashed his Tiger Moth but all
he damaged was his pride!
In 1967 Cliff
joined BAC and still
continued flying at Blackpool
cos he enjoyed the thrill
But once his first child came along
the risks were far too high
So he gave up the flying and
stopped riding through the sky
Most time at BAe was spent
in tunnels if you please
Measuring the stress in wind – huh
his life was just a breeze!
Retired ten years ago did Cliff
a mere spring chicken he
Been in our Probus nine years now
and still looks fifty three!
Been our Social Sec a while
he sorts events just right
He's done this lunch we've got today
Cooked everything last night!
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Bill O'Connor
Now Bill O'Connor, there's a lad
From Ennis, County Clare
Watching, brooding, commenting, he's
a critic in armchair!
Insurance was what he was in
with dry wit and a smile
Nobody knew just what he did
He worked with stealth and guile
A pet dislike of Bill's are those
of female species who
report on footie - how dare they
They haven't got a clue!
And as for rugby, well Bill gets
so mad he blows a fuse
And loses interest in the match
and who might win or lose
He does enjoy his music but
with rap he has no time
It's so bizarre and terrible
releasing it's a crime!
Bill does like walking in the Lakes
Relaxes and reflects
On all the bloody useless things
and what he'll target next!
Been Registrar for ten years now
Keeps member lists to date
Likes things just so and suffers not
a fool who's second rate!
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Stuart Westley
Immediate Past President
Is Stuart Westley see
Was Minister at Lothersdale
Near Skipton where it be!
He later taught at Arnold School
Was maths that he held dear
Like how to find capacities
Of an extended sphere!
Was a group leader U3A
Discussed the bible true
He knows his testaments this man
Debated ethics too
He joined our club some time ago
Compassion always lead
Encouraged pastoral beliefs
A good ethos to spread
His talks to Probus varied so
"Cathars of France", e.g.
Don't ask me what that was about
I wasn't there, you see!
Another talk that Stuart gave
The title sounds quite good
"The Madhouse" - does it ring a bell?
With some of you it should!
He also talked about Sudan
And army days of old
His wartime signal escapades
Were wondrous to unfold
He's not been well as we all know
Probus wish him good cheer
The place is not the same now that
Our Stuart is not here
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Bill Ellis
Bill Ellis is our Treasurer
He counts up all the pounds
And if we spend a bit too much
you can be sure he frowns!
He studied and he qualified
The ship he runs is tight
If he sees things that don't add up
he'll stalk you till it's right!
He loves his music does our Bill
both classical and brass
and songs from shows he also likes
those tunes with style and class
He'll hum a tune from Oliver!
and then a song from Chess
He'll tell you what the story is
Of Porgy and of Bess
Because he's chartered he became
a top man in his field
So good he lectured students
where accountancy appealed
For many years he treasurer-ed
The Blackpool District Scouts
Accounts were always accurate
Of that there was no doubt
He's equally efficient, Bill
and certainly has brains
He must have, went to grammar school
In Poulton - aye - to Baines!
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Geoff Hayman
Now to a man who's a legend
Geoff Hayman, Speaker Sec
Where do I start with Kentish Man?
A list so long to check!
Heard of two double four zero
Precedes seven five two, Sir!
His days in RAF training
To one of his talks I refer
See Geoff just doesn't book speakers
He's one himself and good
Can tell you history and cricket
He's never hit a dud!
Worked in insurance in London
Late sixties moved up here
Always had several hobbies
Cycling was one I hear
National Championships, oh yes
A twenty four hour race
Four hundred miles he cycled, wow
That is a cracking pace
Was quite a big blood donor, Geoff
Gave sixty six pints, heck!
Eight gallons, crikey, that's a lot
A bushel or four pecks!
Was fined this year for speeding, blast
Drove sixty years no prob
Coppers ought to concentrate
on scum that harm and rob
At nasty crosswords he's the man
He's won so many prizes
He loves to sort the cryptic clues
in all their many guises
Was President ten years ago
Been Speaker Sec for years
He's at the heart of our great club
Respected by his peers
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Les Hall
Now to the youngest amongst us
He says time and again
He joined us seven years ago
Was eighty seven then!
Was a sales manager, Les was
and still he dresses smart
Has taken on the kitchen
and made brewing quite an art!
Dapper Les with his tea towel poised
comes out to grab your cup
Moves silently among the crowd
and stares if you don't sup!
He keeps the whole kitchen spotless
wipes a mean surface does Hall
Also gets very nice biccies
Not a bad bloke overall
Keen to run brews as a business
Sales increasing each week
Served with a smile and a greeting
and just a dash of cheek!
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John Longstaff
From Buckinghamshire next man up
John Longstaff is his name
He joined the RAF at seventeen
and went to seek his fame
He saw the world alright and stayed
in all for fourteen years
And then he moved to BAe
up north in Lancashire
Redundancy in ninety one
so off he went and got
A job involving VAT
It taxed him quite a lot!
In ninety five he moved again
This time the CSA
But John had problems with his heart
and so he could not stay
So he retired at fifty eight
but John had lots to do
Helping at the Rugby Club
and St Annes Cricket too
He likes his golf, plays twice a week
and Captain he has been
But that's not all - he's done his bit
on council he was seen
A councillor for twenty years
He always did his share
And was rewarded rightly so
with the top job - the Mayor
He loves his holidays, our man
He's on one now I'm told
He's sailing to New York you know
On cruising he is sold!
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Keith Barlow
A man of many talents next
Keith Barlow is the name
Has been in printing all his life
It is his claim to fame
Poster writing, lettering and
Anything requested
Displayed in any form you need
Then framed or even crested!
A keen photographer to boot
He worked so very hard
Weddings, functions, so much more
His business boomed, he starred!
Joined our Probus twelve years since
and settled in quite quick
For eight years now he's done us proud
He's always there to click!
The effort that he puts in to
his work is next to none
The presidential Year Books are
amazing, so well done
Photos of our Officers or
the Presidents’ Name Boards
are all done with so little fuss
and others would be floored!
If he was not printing one day
Keith tinkered with his motors
He bought them and then did them up
and no doubt took some photos!
He tells me that over the years
he's owned up to one twenty!
Now to the rest of us that seems
a good deal more than plenty!
The man's a genius and now
he's VP - rightly so
His Presidential year will be
so well deserved we know
The only problem that we'll have
when he becomes top man
Is who will do his job for us
If anybody can
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Dave Brumby
Dave Brumby is the next man up
He's built just like a bear
Always dressed smart in a blazer
You always know he's there!
Jolly Green Giant of Probus
Fond of drink and good food
Sometimes sends emails to others
But only if they're rude!
Keen on his rugby and bowling
A damned good sportsman he
Great man to have on committee
and makes nice cups of tea!
Member of Lytham Men's Forum
Also the Lowther you know
St Annes Parish Church in addition
Right busy so and so!
A former licensee our Dave
He's come a long way since
Now our Chief Milk Monitor
Just watch him slop and rinse!
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Jim Fawcett
And so to quite a new recruit
to our committee - Jim
Our Fawcett's from the North East
but he's not a Geordie, him
No, Durham's where our man is from
Northumberland - no way
So he's a Mackem, so he is
Still proud of it today
Son of a miner, grew up tough
It's stood him in good stead
He didn't risk the mines as such
But covered risks instead!
Yes he went in insurance and
sold policies to folk
A most successful guy was he
He said so when we spoke!
He travelled round in charge of sales
Newcastle and then Hull
Southampton, Birmingham he went
his diary always full
At last he came to Preston where
he managed a large zone
All Lancs and most of Cumbri
He loved it - never moaned!
Retired a few years ago
His main hobby is bowling
Loves to contemplate his jack
then send his wood a-rolling!
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Rob Wilkinson
Though strictly not committee man
I've done some verse the same
Our Honorary Auditor
Rob Wilkinson's the name
Born in the Midlands, Nuneaton
A sports fan from a boy
Supported Aston Villa for
some fifty years - deep joy!
In sixty six insurance called
First Fire then Accident
A minor role in Shipping, too
But after five years spent
He moved to Auditing but this
meant travelling all round
The hotel life was fine until
he chose to settle down
He wed and after a short spell
in Bristol, moved to Reading
Commuted into London – for
promotion he was heading
In early eighties Ipswich was
for five years office base
And then to Lytham where he's stayed
A less frenetic pace
After retiring ten years since
He's spent hundreds of hours
on preservation in Witch Wood
protecting trees and flowers
He helps Civic Society
to look after the wood
replacing trees and trying
to placate the neighbourhood!
Rob's also keen at cycling
and keeping fit and trim
He's outside more than in is Rob
And that's what keeps him slim
Our Honorary Auditor
he's been for four years now
Every year he makes the figures
balance - we don't know how!
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Eric Burrell
Next up its Eric Burrell now
In thirties London born
When war broke out the family
were split - it was forlorn
His sis and he were sent away
Evacuated to
a place in Cornwall miles from home
Whatever would they do?
As they stood on the platform with
the other kids they cried
Suitcases, gas masks, labelled up
The tears they could not hide
Our man was down in Cornwall for
five years till war was done
Came back ok, worked hard at school
Till all his grades were won
He qualified in building work
Construction teams he led
Was a success and popular
At least that's what he said!
To Liverpool he had to come
sometimes for work and thus
was offered Manager one day
Moved north with no great fuss
He settled here with no regrets
Joined Probus once retired
A very keen committee man
and sometimes quite inspired!
Was President four years ago
deserved the honour so
A nice chap Eric Burrell - aye
As all of us well know!
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Matthew Willey
We're nearly done but not quite yet
There's Matthew Willey now
He's influenced a lot of lives
I'll try to tell you how
Leader of some scout troops also
activities such as
canoeing, caving, windsurfing
Yes - all these skills he has
Also teaching badminton and
squash and a whole lot more
Camping, walking, anything
to make the poor kids sore!
His camping trips are legend and
so many miles were trekked
The Duke of Edinburgh Scheme
taught teamwork and respect
Teaching's in the blood with Matt
He misses it a lot
But since his illness has he been
inactive? No, he's not!
If I can turn to holidays
Frank Spencer comes to mind
The Isle of Wight disaster struck
His knee went out of line
And then in Staffordshire he fell
right into a canal
Is he drinking or short sighted?
Just be more careful, pal!
What upset Matthew most was that
his camera was bust.
Drowned another one in Chester
so waterproof s a must!
Matthew keeps committee on
the right track all the time
Very ordered - makes sure that
we operate just fine
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Harold Stokes
So last but by no means the least
to Harold Stokes we move
From Birmingham our man he hails
Just as his accent proves!
As soon as he left school he worked
upon the railways, see
But joined the Army when he could
Tank Regiment was he
After the war, returned to rail
and in the Midlands stayed
But nineteen sixty eight the move
up to St Annes was made
A life long Aston Villa fan
He likes to watch most sports
Good runner though at badminton
would terrorise the courts
So keen to strike the shuttlecock
His passion sometimes flared
The team once could have gone abroad
if Harold hadn't sweared!
Technology's not beaten him
Sends email - got the hang
But as for mobile 'phones he would
ignore it if it rang
Enjoys his Probus - was so proud
to be our President
To me young Harold, you are great
A really smashing gent!
So there you go, you motley crew
I've rhymed myself to tears!
So I shall have another drink
Good health to all and Cheers!
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